better late than never eh. the making of a man’s man’s commercial…via media blips…

super-interesting ny mag article on the new buildings that have sprung up around nyc in the latest building boom. they talk about the history of a number of buildings, and pictures of the before and after, and give their assessment on whether the replacement was even worth it (for example avalon=shit, moma=good). and while im by no means old-school, it was cool to see the buildings and what used to be there side by side…especially the ones that were familiar to me growing up. in this city, its easy to forget what was once here the second something new takes its place. they had pictures of the old palladium (yikes 90’s flashbacks), old bowery and houston, the parking lot on astor, old (and skanky) times square, etc.

> the glass stampede (via curbed)

found in my inbox today….an email making its way around…

addendum
ha…ivor just enlightened us to the source of the letter…annietown. <3

Dear Architects, I Am Sick of Your Shit, by Annie Choi

Once, a long time ago in the days of yore, I had a friend who was studying architecture to become, presumably, an architect.

This friend introduced me to other friends, who were also studying architecture. Then these friends had other friends who were architects – real architects doing real architecture like designing luxury condos that look a lot like glass dildos. And these real architects knew other real architects and now the only people I know are architects. And they all design glass dildos that I will never work or live in and serve only to obstruct my view of New Jersey. Do not get me wrong, architects. I like you as a person. I think you are nice, smell good most of the time, and I like your glasses. You have crazy hair, and if you are lucky, most of it is on your head. But I do not care about architecture. It is true. This is what I do care about:

* burritos
* hedgehogs
* coffee

As you can see, architecture is not on the list. I believe that architecture falls somewhere between toenail fungus and invasive colonoscopy in the list of things that interest me.

Perhaps if you didn’t talk about it so much, I would be more interested. When you point to a glass cylinder and say proudly, hey my office designed that, I giggle and say it looks like a bong. You turn your head in disgust and shame. You think, obviously she does not understand. What does she know? She is just a writer. She is no architect. She respects vowels, not glass cocks. And then you say now I am designing a lifestyle center, and I ask what is that, and you say it is a place that offers goods and services and retail opportunities and I say you mean like a mall and you say no. It is a lifestyle center. I say it sounds like a mall. I am from the Valley, bitch. I know malls.

Architects, I will not lie, you confuse me. You work sixty, eighty hours a week and yet you are always poor. Why aren’t you buying me a drink? Where is your bounty of riches? Maybe you spent it on merlot. Maybe you spent it on hookers and blow. I cannot be sure. It is a mystery. I will leave that to the scientists to figure out.

Architects love to discuss how much sleep they have gotten. One will say how he was at the studio until five in the morning, only to return again two hours later. Then another will say, oh that is nothing. I haven’t slept in a week. And then another will say, guess what, I have never slept ever. My dear architects, the measure of how hard you’ve worked and how much you’ve accomplished is not related to the number of hours you have not slept. Have you heard of Rem Koolhaas? He is a famous architect. I know this because you tell me he is a famous architect. I hear that Rem Koolhaas is always sleeping. He is, I presume, sleeping right now. And I hear he gets shit done. And I also hear that in a stunning move, he is making a building that looks not like a glass cock, but like a concrete vagina. When you sleep more, you get vagina. You can all take a lesson from Rem Koolhaas.

Life is hard for me, please understand. Architects are an important part of my existence. They call me at eleven at night and say they just got off work, am I hungry? Listen, it is practically midnight. I ate hours ago. So long ago that, in fact, I am hungry again. So yes, I will go. Then I will go and there will be other architects talking about AutoCAD shortcuts and something about electric panels and can you believe that is all I did today, what a drag. I look around the table at the poor, tired, and hungry, and think to myself, I have but only one bullet left in the gun. Who will I choose?

I have a friend who is a doctor. He gives me drugs. I enjoy them. I have a friend who is a lawyer. He helped me sue my landlord. My architect friends have given me nothing. No drugs, no medical advice, and they don’t know how to spell subpoena. One architect friend figured out that my apartment was one hundred and eighty seven square feet. That was nice. Thanks for that.

I suppose one could ask what someone like me brings to architects like yourselves. I bring cheer. I yell at architects when they start talking about architecture. I force them to discuss far more interesting topics, like turkey eggs. Why do we eat chicken eggs, but not turkey eggs? They are bigger. And people really like turkey. See? I am not afraid to ask the tough questions.

So, dear architects, I will stick around, for only a little while. I hope that one day some of you will become doctors and lawyers or will figure out my taxes. And we will laugh at the days when you spent the entire evening talking about some European you’ve never met who designed a building you will never see because you are too busy working on something that will never get built. But even if that day doesn’t arrive, give me a call anyway, I am free.

Yours truly,
Annie Choi

good times. we went to rotterdam today for a studio field trip. ill get to that in another post.

in the latter-day incarnations of this journal, ive been wont to keep work-related topics out…for privacy, disinterest, or whatever. but this shit is too funny. curbed just posted about the new residential development going up on the upper east side called lucida, replete with renderings offered on their website. guess who did those renderings?

of particular note is the last one they mention, which they went ahead and called “daddy got a brand new mom” (i lol’d). its a shame they didnt see some earlier incarnations of that render, which ran the gamut of “daddy i wet my bed” to “its a cold and lonely world“.

> lucida lovin’ (via curbed)

i lol’d…

via gawker (via hosan)

welcome back som. i was wondering whether they would return to their uninspiring crap architectural ways. i was initially a bit worried, after seeing the original redesign of the freedom tower back in 2003 and actually thinking that it looked nice. slender, elegant, and incorporating green architecture with its wind farms, the older design actually surprised me (in a good way). but after seeing the new freedom tower design, i dont have to worry anymore about som losing their ways. the uninspired and horribly pedantic design evokes classic som in ways the older design could only dream of. redesigned because of security concerns, the new design is symmetrical, blocky, boorish, and rests on a big slab of security paranoia. the giant centered antenna, which brings the towers height to the gloriously symbolic 1776 ft, is like the crown that sits atop a monument to mediocrity. hooray for architecture in america!

> new freedom tower sucks (via ny times)
> original freedom tower (2003)

in other fun news, thom mayne was named the pritzker prize recipient for 2005. finally! i was wondering when he would get the due respect he deserves. thom mayne and morphosis have been designing dynamic architecture for decades now, articulating forms and ideologies that pretty well influenced me for five years in school. ive seen him lecture a number of times in school as well. hes very tall.

two of my favorite architects winning the pritzker prize back-to-back. good times…good times.

> thom mayne wins 2005 pritzker prize (via ny times)
> morphosis website
> zaha hadid wins 2004 pritzker prize (old post)